Violins And Heartstrings - Chapter 27

Buffy sat on the back porch of her house just outside Paris and sighed. Anya moved to sit on the step next to her and handed her another glass of wine.

"Sorry for dragging you back here. Can't believe that jerk dumped me, me! Like I'm not the best thing that ever happened to him." Anya propped her head up on the palm of her hand and watched Willow running around the garden.

"It's okay." Buffy mumbled as she watched her daughter, she was hunting faeries again and humming a little tune to herself.

"You okay? You seem a little distant, kinda dreamy. Like you don't want to be here."

"I'm fine, honest. It's just seeing Willow, she's just so like him and it hurts…I miss him so much…" Buffy looked up at the sky, watching the colours changing from blue to purple to orange as the sun set.

"Miss who?" Anya looked at her and cocked her head to one side.

"Spike." Buffy sighed and let her eyes fall back to earth, they followed her daughter intently as she picked through the flowerbeds.

"Spike? Who's Spike?" Anya frowned at her.

"Spike is William." She sipped her glass of wine and smiled dreamily.

"Spike is William? You're not making any sense, how can I tell what's happening when you're not making sense." Anya started to feel mildly panicked over Buffy's vagueness; usually her friend was level headed and clear about everything.

"Huh?" Buffy stared at her friend, realising that she was right--she wasn't making any sense. "I met him again, we we're on the same stupid entertainment show…the one I had to go shoot the day I arrived."

"You met him again? Oh my god Buffy, you didn't tell me…I called and you didn't tell me."

"Shhh…" Buffy intimated Willow and Anya's mouth formed an 'o'.

"You haven't told Willow."

"No. It was so up in the air for a while. I didn't want her knowing until Spike had made a decision about us." Buffy took another sip of wine to steady herself as she thought about him, about how he wanted to be a part of her and Willows lives.

"So tell me about him, I mean everything…what you did together, what you didn't do together. Leave no detail unsaid."

Buffy shook her head and smiled; in the face of gossip, Anya had seemed to forget all about her supposedly broken heart.

"He was on the show with me, he's an actor now."

"Like he always wanted to be, would I recognise him?"

"Guess so. Spike Thornton."

"Spike Thornton! That gorgeous blond thing with the abs to die for…that's your William?" Anya's mouth hung open as she stared at Buffy and caused her to blush a violent shade of red.

"Um…yeah." Buffy looked sheepish.

"Tell me more…" Anya leant forwards slightly and drank a mouthful of wine, an eager glint in her eyes.

"We talked, he wants to be Willows father, we realised that we're both still in love with each other, there was much snuggliness and then um…we…you know." Buffy blushed again.

"You did it? Oh my god…my best friend slept with the man of my dreams…how unfair is that? I get my heart broken and you're off racking up the orgasms with Mr Adorable Abdominals."

"Anya!" Buffy objected and frowned at her. "He happens to be the man I love, the father of my child…"

Buffy looked at Willow as she crouched down and held the hem of her skirt as she collected pebbles in it. When Willow turned and gave her a wide smile Buffy couldn't stop herself from smiling back at her and then sighing--she reminded her so much of Spike.

"So, you two made with the happy…then what?"

"You called. I came here."

Anya raised her brows in disbelief. "You what?"

"You called me, you were upset and I couldn't leave you to get all uber-miserable and mopey." Buffy placed her glass down by her side and then caught the look on Anya's face. "What?"

"Buffy…you slept with him…and then disappeared to Paris…this sound at all familiar to you?" Anya placed a hand on Buffy's shoulder and waited for it to soak in.

"He wouldn't think…I left him a note…he wouldn't…" Buffy remembered what she'd written on her note, in her hurry she hadn't realised just how bad it would sound to him. "Oh god Anya…he would…he's going to think I'm doing it again…I have to go…"

"Wait…where are you going?"

"New York…" Buffy paused mid stride on the porch. "Oh god…he won't be there, by the time I get there he'll be in LA."

"I'll get your tickets booked, you call your agent…have them do something…"

"They can call the studios…" Buffy waved her hands excitedly as her voice gained an octave. "Spike on the show, there was this whole thing about me contributing to the soundtrack of his movie. I can get my agent to tell the director I want to talk to him about it…"

She ran another few steps and paused again.

"Buffy?" Anya stood up and walked over to her.

"What if he hates me…what if I ruined it all again?" She felt a cold wave of fear wash over her and turned to look at Willow, she was standing by the porch steps looking up at her, her skirt full of pebbles as she held it.

"He won't hate you. He loves you. Now shift your ass!" Anya flicked her mobile open and watched Buffy run into the house, shaking her head she looked down at Willow.

Anya watched her the whole time she was booking tickets for Buffy and as she clicked her phone shut, she smiled triumphantly.

Willow frowned up at Anya and let the hem of her skirt go, her stones dropped to the floor and rattled on the bottom step of the porch.

"Why is everyone so silly today?" Willow walked up the steps of the porch and pouted up at Anya.

Looking down at Willow, she could see the resemblance between Spike and the little girl in front of her. Anya crouched down and pushed a strand of hair behind Willows ear.

"Mommy is insane, honey, she did something stupid and now she has to go make it all good again." Anya smiled tenderly at her.

"Anya, any luck with those tickets? I tried calling him but his phone is off or engaged or something." Buffy reappeared from the house and looked at Anya and Willow, both of them stared at her with wide eyes.

"You're booked on tomorrows evening flight to LA."

"Mommy…where are you going?" Willow tugged on her shirt sleeve and Buffy crouched so her face was level with hers daughters--the more Buffy stared into her clear blue eyes the more she saw Spike reflected in them.

"Sweetie…I have to tell you something…" Buffy smoothed her hair and took a deep breath.

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